I read a passage that I really liked in "Still Alice". Alice was asking her daughter about her new boyfriend. The questions were as follows":
That seems to me to be the most important thing, the factor that determines whether a relationship will work or not, whether you will be happy or not. Are you yourself when you are with your partner? I think back to some early relationships where I was drooling over a guy, embarrassed to reveal everything about myself because I thought I wasn't cool enough or would come up lacking. But I got lucky (ode to Steve). I can really answer "myself" to that question. Stubborn, passionate, hesitant, careful, impetuous, cheesy, thoughtful...I got a guy who wants (or who'll take) it all.
What are you like with him? I was able to answer that easily, for which I'm grateful.
- What's he like? (notice it's not "What's he do?")
- What's he like with you? (concern for child)
- (and, my personal favourite and the reason I am writing this) What are you like with him?
That seems to me to be the most important thing, the factor that determines whether a relationship will work or not, whether you will be happy or not. Are you yourself when you are with your partner? I think back to some early relationships where I was drooling over a guy, embarrassed to reveal everything about myself because I thought I wasn't cool enough or would come up lacking. But I got lucky (ode to Steve). I can really answer "myself" to that question. Stubborn, passionate, hesitant, careful, impetuous, cheesy, thoughtful...I got a guy who wants (or who'll take) it all.
What are you like with him? I was able to answer that easily, for which I'm grateful.
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